reminder
Do you ever get frustrated because things are moving too slowly in your life? Many people don't realize that building a foundation for success does not happen overnight. It is a slow process in which you are constantly working and learning. After all, that foundation must remain strong, even in times of failure or crisis. This takes time! You may have to remind yourself that "failing" is only failure if you quit; otherwise it's a learning opportunity. So don't worry if your life seems to be moving in slow motion. Concentrate on building a solid foundation and learning from your back steps
My Plan
So I've been going at this weight loss/ healthy lifestyle/ exercise/ love myself shit for years now. Seriously, when will I just get it? I am a quitter and loser. The fact that it's a couple of years later and I'm here starting over is proof positive. I've got a million and half excuses as to why I gained the weight back but not a single one of them matters. I need to do this. I need to push myself and get over the quitter mentality. I've learned that I'm a miserable person when I'm unhealthy. If anything came out of previous success it's that knowledge. Being healthy makes me happy. Simple as that. I have to do this. MY life depends on it.
I am setting a goal for myself of 5% of my body weight at a time. Since I weigh 210 pounds right now, that means 10.5 pounds is 5% of my body weight, I think....math and I have never gotten along very well. I'll try something a little different this time and figure out what 5% of each new weight is too...maybe that will keep me more motivated.
Anyway, as I meet my goals, I plan on rewarding myself! I NEVER reward myself, I wont even buy myself the right kind of shampoo half the time because I hate wasting money on me. But self help is a great thing and something to look forward to. My rewards will always non food items and always something personal.
I will also make a meal plan each saturday night, buy the groceries sunday and stick with it through the week. I will be making Brian do this with me and he will lose more weight than me and I will get jealous but that will not make me quit like it would have in the past. I will be able to fit into my clothes again. I will want to dress up and put on makeup and fix myhair again. I will feel like a human being again. And I WILL learn to love myself FINALLY!
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Gotta come clean
Today was NOT good! I overslept cause I took some medicine last night that knocked me out, so no morning workout or time to really eat anything decent. I had about a cup of honeydew melon and coffee but the hotel breakfast had these cute little breakfast burritos and since I had to eat and run I grabbed one. It wasn't too harmful, just eggs and a tiny bit of sausage really, but I know it was a bad choice. It was either eat that or go hungry and I don't do hungry very well! Well the day didn't get much better. I was still tired at lunch (I hate cold medicine, it makes me feel drowsy for days) and being tired and having a crappy breakfast just puts me in a quitter state of mind. SO for lunch I went to Mexico Chiquito and ordered what was probably the healthiest thing on their menu- two crunchy beef tacos with no cheese. After lots of research I know for a fact that is usually the most harmless menu item at fast food mexican joints so I don't feel too bad about it, but I know it wasn't healthy either. It came with enough chips for 4 people and I ate probably enough for 2 before throwing the bag away. I should have taken out a portion first and thrown the rest awat before eating it. I just ate the salsa that came with it. I did try the cheesedip, but was smart and threw it out before I could eat more cause it was good! Anyway, as soon as I got back to my hotel room I ate some fresh fruit because my body really does crave it now and I also ate a serving of whole wheat crackers with some low fat cheese spread. I feel better now that I put good stuff in my body. I haven't decided on dinner yet, but I'm thinking salmon with rice and veggies sounds really good! I am tempted to revert back to my old ways....I was bad all day so why not be bad tonight? But then I remind myself, those are my OLD ways....I am a NEW me and the NEW healthier, smarter, HOTTER me knows that 2 bad meals does not open the door for one more bad meal. If anything, it closes it, locks the door, throws away the key and then bricks over the dang door so you can't ever open it again! So tonight I will be good, or try my very hardest. Being sick really does wonders on my motivation. I feel like I am already suffering, why not medicate with food. again with the old self trying to break free. I really don't know if I will make it to the gym today though, that is one thing I will allow myself when I am truly sick. Which I think I really am. I have a fever and a red rough patchy looking throat. Wonderful. Oh and I drowning in mucus. Yuck. Maybe just a long soak in the hot tub and if I feel up to it a quick swim. Depends on how many people are there, I don't want to swim with people wile I am sick. I am guessing they wouldn't appreciate it either. Ok, that's my confession for the day. I was bad, but not terrible. There is still the potential for terrible. I will repost after dinner. And I will be honest I promise!
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