I go through serious bi-polar issues when it comes to this blog. I'm either way in to it or just say screw it for days at a time! Usually when I'm not blogging it's because I'm slacking off and not being healthy but not this time! I'm actually stuck with it for a good length of time now! The whole healthy thing I mean, obviously not blogging.....
ANYWAY....
Since I signed up for the medically supervised weight loss thingy I have done really well! I started at 171 and am now down to 166! 5 pounds in just over 2 weeks of good with me! I've been keeping my calorie count under 1200 a day and that seems to be the magic number for me. Oh, I cancelled my weight watchers subscription, again. I just wasn't using it and when I did use it it wasn't anything new that I didn't already know so I just figured hell I'll save $20 a month and use what the program taught me for free! So while I will forever credit WW for the majority oy my weight loss I just don't need it anymore! I've still got some work to do as far as learning to love working out again. That's my problem area at the moment. Eating healthy and less isn't too bad, but when I get home, I just want to enjoy maddie or clean or waste time on facebook or daydream about you know who ;) anything but workout! I'm making myself head to yoga here in about 20 minutes and hoping that rekindles my love for it because I do miss it and the way it made me feel. So here's a sample of what I've been eating cause I don't really feel like posting my menu
breakfast: protein smoothie made with milk and a banana
lunch: oatmeal with raisins and walnuts
dinner: veggies, a whole grain 4 oz of lean protein
dinner varies, last week I cooked a box of brown rice, some quinoa, steamed a bag of veggies and thawed a few different types of meat and I have just been mixing it together in whatever combination sounds good at the time! Tonight I had brown rice with veggies that I cooked in a pan with a little bit of terryaki sauce then grilled a piece of tilapia ad put ginger and garlic seasoning. Very tasty and quick!
I realized that after over a year of losing weight and trying to come to terms with my body that I may have a skewed version of how I look. I came to this realization through the help of a very loving and supportive person and because I realized today that I am very close to my original goal weight. I'm not sure if I will ever really like what I see in the mirror but I am trying. This kinda scares me, because then what will I gripe about? I decided my next issue to tackle is my debt. So IF the day ever comes when I look in the mirror and think Wow she's hot....this will be a financial blog. HA!
On that note I did download an app that helps see the big picture when it comes to credit card debt and I realized this- if I don't charge another dime, it will take me no less than 2.5 years to pay off my debt. I know that's not bad compared to some people, but still it's a little overwhelming because I know I am not ready to not charge stuff yet. I can afford to pay for everything I NEED on a cash basis, but that's the problem. I never stick to just what I need. Who does?? I've developed a new addiction to living social and have got to control it. I'm going to be setting goals and limits for myself in that arena vry soon. I'm thinkin make a budget, make it cash only so if I don't have the cash I don't use it, and ATTEMPT to think of the future. I want to own a house and would love to by the time I am 30, maybe 32 and that aint happenin at my current rate of spending. I've already taken my credit cards OUT of my wallet which is a step in the right direction. While I know that's not enough this is big for me and every little step gets me closer. Anyway, I will get into this topic more later. For now I'll keep this about weight loss!
Maybe I'll post a more recent picture of my slowly becoming hotty body ;)
reminder
Do you ever get frustrated because things are moving too slowly in your life? Many people don't realize that building a foundation for success does not happen overnight. It is a slow process in which you are constantly working and learning. After all, that foundation must remain strong, even in times of failure or crisis. This takes time! You may have to remind yourself that "failing" is only failure if you quit; otherwise it's a learning opportunity. So don't worry if your life seems to be moving in slow motion. Concentrate on building a solid foundation and learning from your back steps
My Plan
So I've been going at this weight loss/ healthy lifestyle/ exercise/ love myself shit for years now. Seriously, when will I just get it? I am a quitter and loser. The fact that it's a couple of years later and I'm here starting over is proof positive. I've got a million and half excuses as to why I gained the weight back but not a single one of them matters. I need to do this. I need to push myself and get over the quitter mentality. I've learned that I'm a miserable person when I'm unhealthy. If anything came out of previous success it's that knowledge. Being healthy makes me happy. Simple as that. I have to do this. MY life depends on it.
I am setting a goal for myself of 5% of my body weight at a time. Since I weigh 210 pounds right now, that means 10.5 pounds is 5% of my body weight, I think....math and I have never gotten along very well. I'll try something a little different this time and figure out what 5% of each new weight is too...maybe that will keep me more motivated.
Anyway, as I meet my goals, I plan on rewarding myself! I NEVER reward myself, I wont even buy myself the right kind of shampoo half the time because I hate wasting money on me. But self help is a great thing and something to look forward to. My rewards will always non food items and always something personal.
I will also make a meal plan each saturday night, buy the groceries sunday and stick with it through the week. I will be making Brian do this with me and he will lose more weight than me and I will get jealous but that will not make me quit like it would have in the past. I will be able to fit into my clothes again. I will want to dress up and put on makeup and fix myhair again. I will feel like a human being again. And I WILL learn to love myself FINALLY!
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You look great, Amanda!!! : )
ReplyDeleteYou are so amazing and beautiful, your man is very lucky to have such a wonderful woman.
ReplyDeleteYOU sure are...goofy ;)
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